talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
