is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Randomize
