Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
