Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
