A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
