Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
