Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Randomize
