you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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