my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I wish you could order shots online.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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