Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
We're too hungover to prance.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Randomize
