I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Randomize
