dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
