I molested 6 butterflies tonight
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
birth control should be required to get into college
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
