i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
