Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Randomize