me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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