i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Randomize
