butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
