im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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