Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
