this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
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