I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
