Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
