you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Randomize
