She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Randomize
