Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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