God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I fill condoms, not promises.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I want a musical about memes.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
