More tranny stories later!
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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