Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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