then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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