Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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