chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
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