she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
