dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I got inside last night via doggy door
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize