okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Randomize
