I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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