My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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