I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
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