used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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