"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
