Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Someone came in the potted fern
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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