I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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