So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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