I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
