i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
