I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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