it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
