so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
