It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
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