He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
